Divorce and financial issues often go hand-in-hand. Some couples break up because they’re facing endless financial stress and are just not making enough money to make ends meet. Others may disagree about financial decisions or experience financial infidelity to a degree that isn’t manageable.
In many cases, though, the root issue of a couple’s financial challenges is that each spouse has a very different perspective on finances more broadly. They view money differently, and these views are not necessarily compatible.
Spending and saving
Perhaps the clearest example of this is when one spouse is a spender and the other is a saver. For a saver, money represents security. They want to put money aside and only spend on the absolute essentials. They think about long-term needs, saving for a retirement, paying for a child’s college education, etc. They understand that life inspires certain costs – food, shelter, etc. – and they do not want to spend beyond those costs most of the time.
For a spender, money represents opportunity. They want to spend the money that they earn to acquire certain possessions or have experiences. They value what money can do for them today over the long-term security of setting that money aside. They would rather do what they want now and address future financial issues when they arrive.
Both spouses may honestly feel that their perspective is correct, and the argument can be made for both sides. It’s not that one person is right and the other person is wrong. But you can see how these perspectives could be in conflict, leading to disagreements and stress for a married couple. This disconnect can eventually lead to a divorce.